I don't think marriage is for you...sorry. Perhaps stop being so reliant on men and start focusing on your children. You seem to me someone who prioritises men over your children which is not healthy for them or you. You know you are your own person and you don't actually need a man in your life to complete you. I think if you are on your 4th divorce you should perhaps give men a rest for a bit. You may also want to invest in some birth control.
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